I got on a biz call with a potential strategic partner, and she asked what my “communication style,” was and I responded with “Be clear. Be direct. Be Kind… and yes you can do all three…at the same time.”

She laughed and said, “OMG we’re going to get along real well.” We philosophized and commiserated at the same time on how most people and conversations fall miserably short of upholding these key principles. Yet when we’re clear, direct, and kind, it totally shifts the conversation.

Two hours later, someone followed up with their “hard sell/fake gushing,” routine. I smiled and reminded myself to practice all three. I listened for a few minutes. I told them I had only five minutes before my next appointment boundaries are essential too!

They shared their canned “shpiel” and I said in a clear way, “Thanks for the offer and the “scholarship” but that’s very gracious of you AND I’m very clear where my marketing dollars are going for the rest of the year. She countered with “How about….(blah blah blah) to which I said, “Thanks again, but really it’s not at all in the direction I choose to go.” She thanked me and I wished her all the best. The exchange was done in under 5.

I remember my dad telling me at any early age, “Girlfriend, people skills are the most important skills hands down. Learn them soon, learn them well, and life will be far more enjoyable and rewarding.” I really believe he’s right, and learning to communicate with simple but foundational values makes all the difference in the world.

How by adapting these three principles can it make a difference in your relationships and communication skills?

Thanks for tuning in and not tuning out.